HEADS UP, this is a long-ish post just wanted to warn you incase the too wordy post isn’t really your jam. I’m not really the open book type especially on social media & on the blog but this post just kind of happened and I went with it. I typed it in my notes app & emailed it to myself. It was a random thought I had while I was looking at my IG bio the other day it led me down a rabbit hole of looking at other bios and comparing. Was mine up to par? Should I be labeled a blogger because I do have a blog? Should I be an influencer, I am apart of an affiliate platform? Does it matter what I put? Does anyone else care? Does it really even matter? I love having a business account so I can utilize the swipe up & business shop option in my stories which gives me the ability to link products from retailers as well as from my shop directly to post & stories * if you don’t know I own an online boutique* what should I claim my IG as: website, blogger, brand, boutique or some variation of women’s clothing store. None of them felt right especially because I use my Instagram account for personal, blog related & to promote / sell for my boutique. Some say that’s not right that I need at least a separate for my shop, maybe but I’m doing it this way. I want everything to be cohesive and easily navigated. One account allows my readers to get a glimpse into my life, catch up on my blog & shop with me at my boutique. 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Sounds fancy and totally not me but you know what it feels right and I like it. I’ve never been bold at saying I’m a business owner. I don’t know why, I am proud. I’m doing it 100% on my own. Why shouldn’t I be proud to say tell someone that the outfit I’m getting complimented on came from the store I own & I hand picked out. I should be shouting it from the roof tops but I’m not. I don’t get on stories and talk like so many other bloggers & small business owners do. I wish I was like that but I’m not. Key words being I’M NOT. I’m not like the others and that’s fine. It’s ok. I’ve been struggling with the comparison game and it’s definitely gotten the better of me but as always, once you do a little self reflection & a little prayer I’ve seen the light. I am ok to NOT be on the same path as everyone else. I’m getting my groove back and I tell you what it feels good. It feels so good to be ok with my path with my brand, with how I want to do / present things- I use my blog as a creative slash therapeutic outlet. When I first started my blog I started it for this very reason [an outlet to share everything I love] it’s a fun creative way for my to express myself which is actually super therapeutic. I was having a blast blogging my heart out and meeting lots of new blogging friends. Not only could I have this fun creative tool at my finger tips but I could make money and get freebies while looking cute & feeling cool. That sounds lame AF and it is but any blogger / influencer / content creator / whatever else falls into this category you totally know what I mean. It never gets old receiving PR packages in the mail. Over time I began to realize that the glamorous blogging world wasn’t one I was going to fit into. Not because I didn’t want to. I wanted to, oh course I did. It’s like being in college and not wanting to be in a sorority. (Never thought I would have rushed but once i stepped foot on The University of Alabama’s campus I knew it was on. I rushed, pledged & it was amazing! #AOE – only an Alpha Phi sister will get that ref. I wanted that feeling of being a part of something again (lame but true) add in some cute clothes & fun trips ummmm duh of course I wanted to be a freaking blogger & hang with the big girls in the big cool blogger world. Long story short, I did the whole fashion week thing, I joined blogging groups, I almost went to a blogging conference; I was pumped to get to meet so many women doing the same thing I was & so many of them I looked up to (something suddenly came up & I had to unfortunately miss it). I felt like I was making moves with brands I got accepted to the LIKEtoKNOW.it affiliate program. I was feeling myself for sure but something never felt quite right and I couldn’t figure out why I was feeling the drive & desire to continue to fall in line with what all the other bloggers were doing, my friends included. I envied them as they grew, totally proud of them & cheering them on but even though I envied their success in this world I so badly wanted to be apart yet I still had zero drive for the dream. I’ve ebbed & flowed with my fondness of my blog. I’d stopped being proud of it. I quit doing photoshoots. I quit posting on social media for the most part unless it was of my golden girls (if you’re new around here I have two golden retrievers Addison & Ruby aka the goldens girls) I just really didn’t care anymore and I was ok with that. It drove me crazy because I didn’t care. CRAZY right?! I know. Welcome to my brain, it’s a wild ride and I can’t explain it.
In the background of all this I launched a boutique because what else does one half invested blogger do when she feels uninspired, she opens up a store. Why not. So many things go into running a business, I’m not going into all that because literally you probably don’t care and if you do you know how to google, this post is already beyond lengthy. It’s takes a lot. I’m very grateful & blessed to be able to do what I love for a living I’m just giving you a little glimpse into my world by saying it’s mentally, financially & creatively no easy task juggling everything. Basically I’ve been trying to run TWO businesses (blog & boutique) on very little drive & lacking inspiration. I just wanted to say hi I’m still here. I’m back and feeling more like myself, more driven & more determined than ever.
• DISCLAIMER • If you’re looking for a blogger that has a gift guide for every holiday, does try on hauls & spills there every day life I’m not your girl.
I wish I was and I used to wish I was the girl that wanted to do that but I’m not. No shade at anyone who is that blogger. Seriously I’m not hating, I have my faves that I watch and I love that they share so much of themselves and their lives with us. I am influenced to buy SO many things from my blogger friends and others I follow. I use their discount codes, I go watch and like their YouTube videos. I try to read and comment on IG and blog posts to show my support. I’ll let the pros who are already killing it continue to do so and I’ll go down a different creative path. Don’t get me wrong I will still be sharing fashion, duh I own a boutique. I will still share clothes, shoes, makeup, skincare, must have new gadget, whatever is going on with me I’m going to share. I’ve just finally gotten over the feeling of “I’m doing it wrong” because I’m doing x-amount of flat lays, I’m not doing enough sponsored content, I’m not sharing the latest sales or I’m not sharing the same content everyone else is. I’m sure sometimes I’m going to but I feel zero pressure to keep up with or do / fit in with made up standards. Also, no shade to anyone, seriously I get what goes into it & this is a business and you want to make money & so on and so forth. Make your money, do it however you can & what works. I’m figuring out my way and it’s kind of cook to watch it unfold. I’m sure I will do cliche blogger things, it’s inevitable but I’m ok with not fitting in. I’m currently feeling so inspired to write (which feels A-MAZING) hence this novel you’re reading or maybe skimming over. It’s all over the place, sorry but hi, it’s my jumbled up thinking thrown onto the screen. After a lot of self love, care & reflection on so much of my life I’m feeling stronger & more empowered than ever.
Can I also just say that quarantine is the weirdest little situation, it’s bringing so many together, allowing for a lot of self care / self reflection / growth in & on so many levels, such a silver lining in a world full of chaos. 2020 has also been the biggest bitch as you all know in SO many ways. No need to dive into it because you’re living it just like I am. I say a prayer for the hearts & souls of every living person each night. I ask God to watch over & to lead and guide us through these tough & scary times. To quote & kindly disagree with Moira Rose from Schitt’s Creek, “These are dark times John, but not that dark”.
“These are dark times John, but not that dark”.– Moira Rose
These are dark times. They suck. Everyone is asking what they can do, at the very least we can all be a good person. It’s really not that fu%k*ng hard to treat someone how you want to be treated. Literally just stop & think before you speak or act. I would love to connect with new IG friends, Pinterest, Twitter. If you have a blog or small business please leave a link so I can connect with you! Or if you have any fun accounts fashion related or not I love to cook & my golden girls are my whole world so I naturally follow the unhealthiest amount of golden retriever accounts, so share any accounts, shops, Pinterest boards you love with me!
PS if you haven’t watched Schitt’s Creek, you MUST! It’s just what your soul needs right now!